Wednesday, February 4, 2009
(Wavelength real lesbian file photo)
What Oprah hath joined...
Gay marriage pioneers Julie and Hillary Goodridge are calling it quits.
Court documents indicate a settlement in which Mrs. Goodridge will get the house, Indigo Girls CDs and their Great Dane "Gaia," while Mrs. Goodridge will walk away with the couple's Prius, electric hair clippers and three (metric) tons of organic compost.
The Goodridges will maintain joint custody of their 14-year-old collection of Birkenstocks.
"I'm just thrilled and ecstatic -- I mean, in a really sad way," said pioneering gay-divorce lawyer Harv Shankman.
The couple cited "irreconcilable differences" as grounds for ending the astonishing four-year union.
"The plumbing was all wrong," Mrs. Goodridge told the judge with a shrug.
When prompted further, she revealed the couple had tried for years to have a baby, but when the State of Massachusetts and a 2006 discrimination lawsuit against the universe failed to produce a child, things went from bad to worse.
Friends from the couple's favorite sports bar told the Wavelength that the rift actually began when Mrs. and Mrs. Goodridge clashed over who to support in the 2008 Democratic primary, then widened when Mrs. Goodridge blew all the money earned from a decade of farmer's market wind chime sales on a faulty David Crosby insemination kit purchased through Craigslist.
"It's so sad," said a misty-eyed Misty Irons, the Goodridge's pastor at Inclusion Methodist Church. "They were married for four years. That's almost half a whole decade, you know?"
Posted by Splash at 8:54 AM